An unidentified Hamburg resident was quickly arrested by Village of Hamburg Police after he attempted, what one eyewitness called, “The lamest riot ever”.
The incident started at around 3PM, right after the Orlando jury found Casey Anthony not guilty of murder in the 1st degree. A visibly distraught, possibly drunk Hamburg NY native was seen marching down Main St. in the village of Hamburg screaming “Follow me to Florida!! Justice for Caylee!!” as he kicked over a garbage can.
The Hamburg resident then attempted to single-handedly overturn a police vehicle by rocking it back and forth. Unfortunately for the angry rioter, there were two police officers inside the car, and the man was promptly arrested.
“The lone rioter didn’t resist arrest…he didn’t even spill our coffee.”, said one of the arresting officers. When questioned as to the man’s motives, the arresting officer stated “I guess he just thought that’s what people do when an unpopular verdict is announced”.
The Village of Hamburg estimates the damages from the riot at zero dollars, with reports of one overturned garbage can and one very distraught miniature schnauzer, who wouldn’t stop barking over the ordeal.